Art + Review: Archie Marries Betty/Archie Marries Veronica

[harp]

I just got finished reading the 5 part series "Archie Gets Married" in which he first marries Veronica, then Betty (CORRECTION!). I knew it wouldn't last; the creators don't have the guts to make Archie make a final decision. I also knew that if they were going to pander to the audience, they'd make him marry Betty, the clear favorite.



The Pitch
They did a great job with the pitch. We were presented in this "what if?" series with ARCHIE MARRIES VERONICA! first. If it had been him marrying Betty first, people would have believed in its permanence more readily for one and, for another thing, nobody would have paid much attention. "It's about time" would be it. Or "Oh, is Betty having a fever dream?" This was an attention grabber. "He did what?!?!?! Is he an idiot or does he just hate God?!"

The Stories
In A/V, the story focused mainly on Archie and Veronica with everyone else having fallen on hard times. Reggie can't get a job, Betty's struggling, Lord knows what Jughead is doing... but that's all background stuff.

Betty's definitely given less actual time with Archie in her story. Understandably so! They used up most of the good plot on Veronica and didn't have anything left. This was why other couples got a lot of focus in the story. Everyone seems to have found peace, including Big Moose.

The Couples
First off, Jughead/Midge? Could they have made it any more clear that they were just looking to put Jughead with someone? Midge really was the only choice. Cheryl has fallen off of the face of the earth and Big Ethel would be too predictable for a story that already has two very popular couples (Betty/Archie, Veronica/Reggie). And Nancy...

Don't be stupid. She's black, remember?

Jughead and Midge just felt fake. Then again, so did Archie and Betty. I really tried to enjoy it, tried to feel their love and feel happy to see what I've wanted since sixth grade. I just couldn't. The second comic was rushed with barely any scenes of them being romantic (where as Veronica got tons of those). Even the first story focused more on Archie gearing up to be engaged to her.

Come to think of it, Archie and Veronica felt fake, too, but that was probably because even the creators of the story don't buy their relationship. I mean, they did all the things couples in love do. They looked the part and Veronica uttered not one bitchy word. She didn't even shout at Archie! I kept waiting for her to, though. I kept waiting for the other shoe to drop as it were.

The only believable couple in the series was Reggie and Veronica for some reason. And their engagement and marriage was depicted in all of twenty panels tops. Their wedding was total bullshit, though. Veronica would never have her actual marriage performed by an Elvis impersonator in Vegas and never in the dress she was married in! Jesus Christ, how skanky can you get?! Stay classy, Ronnie.

The gaffs
This is more the fault of the time constraints (and Veronica eating up most of the good story) but the Coopers and the Andrews were much less involved in Betty and Archie's lives than the Lodges and Andrews were in Veronica and Archie's lives. It seems highly unbelievable that this would be the case, especially given how much Mr. Lodge hated Archie. Especially, too, given that the Andrews would probably have an easier time getting along with the Coopers, who, aside from coming from similar socioeconomic backgrounds, are much closer in age.

Also, do Betty and Archie even talk? Their twins are born and Archie asks Jughead and Midge to be the godparents. Then Betty goes and asks Veronica to be the godmother to "little Betty". So if the parents die, the twins are going to be separated or (since Veronica was single at the time) was Veronica supposed to go live with Jug and Midge? Or the other way around, I guess.

Finally, way to give Betty two parts to the story and Veronica three. I get it- you ran out of story for her and didn't want to just copy-pasa the same story but superimpose Betty over Veronica. Really, though, couldn't you have waited a little until you had two solid story lines so that both girls could have equal time?

On the other hand, making Betty and Archie share their engagement and wedding story with a bunch of other story lines and goings-on made it more legitimate somehow. It was more like a normal story, not a super special big deal. We got to see how everyone in Riverdale was doing...

OH! WAIT! Speaking of which! That bit with Grundy/Weatherbee Sven/Beasley was laying it on too thick. Does everyone have to get hitched? I understand! Betty and Archie being together makes the world a better place with sunshine and rainbows, but come the fuck on! That's Rowling-style right there, that Noah's Arking Business. And did the creators realize what they've done by putting that image out there?

Let me lay it out for you:
Mr.Svesen/Miss Beasley Rule 34.

DDDD:

I'm being too critical. Old folks need lovin', too. And all in all, it was a nice series. Really! I even found myself enjoying Veronica/Archie. And seeing Betty pregnant with Archie's babies was great.

Speaking of which (and of Rowling-ing), Archie's semen seems to be designed for making twins. Mercifully, at least one of the babies looks like the mother. I thought it was a little annoying the way the kids are carbon copies of the parents, though. What, they couldn't switch hair color even? Make the girls redheads and the boys brunette/blonde like their mothers?

And when're we getting to see Part Six: Archie Marries Jughead?



I don't even ship Betty/Veronica, actually! I'm dull and traditional- I like Betty/Archie and Veronica/Reggie. Oh, and Jughead/Hamburger. As it ought to bloody be!

Think I slightly over-did it on the water for Betty, though. Don't worry- she's laughing. I promise.

Comment it; Discuss it
Your own Archie ships?
D'you or did you like Archie Comics?
Gimmicks
Should I do an All Requests Post?
Touch your elbows- are they cool to the touch or warm right now?

Comments

[harpsi-fizz.livejournal.com]

Veronica isn't even the one chasing Archie, though. He's the one Ga-ga over her because she's sexy. It has been implied several times, actually (you'll love this) that the only time Veronica is interested in Archie is when he shows interest in Betty. So it is a Harry/Ginny relationship of sorts yeah. Only, I don't know which one is Harry.

You're going to shoot me in the head for saying this, but... Ginny/Harry is actually... it's actually half growing on me. No, no, wait, put down that gun! I'll explain. It's just always paired with R/Hr and there's nothing worse than that. So compared to R/Hr, Veronica and Archie and even Harry/Ginny looks not-so-horrible. At first glance, that is.

Don't worry- my OTP will always be Ron/Draco. That leaves plenty of room for H/Hr. And even if I went with my second OTP (Hermione/Lavender) I'd still be an HHR defender to the bitter end.

I notice how much you like harmonious (no pun)relationships in which the people are friends first. And damnit, I am pleased and excited that you replied to my entry! <3

[madderbrad.livejournal.com]

Well, the Archie lusting after sexy!Veronica is a bang-on parallel with H/G I guess. Rowling's simplistic canon simply made sure that there were no tangled threads, no possibility of romantic confusion, with Hermione written as firmly (and inexplicably) attracted to Won Won.

I notice how much you like harmonious (no pun)relationships in which the people are friends first.

Yeah, that just appeals to me. I mean, H/Hr has friendship and seven years of history piled on top of the physical attraction. H/G is just ... the physical attraction, nothing else. *yawns*

When I glance over the H/G stories of today so many of them are written such that any girl - 'feisty', red-head, etc - could stand in for Ginny. The five minutes of actual history between the two in the canon is both superficial and unused. Whereas a H/Hr story can build on all seven of the books. H/G is just empty in comparison.

[harpsi-fizz.livejournal.com]

In my canon, Ginny will always be an awesome, hardcore femme!lesbian. And she and Tonks run away together. <3

[guardians-song.livejournal.com]

When I glance over the H/G stories of today so many of them are written such that any girl - 'feisty', red-head, etc - could stand in for Ginny. The five minutes of actual history between the two in the canon is both superficial and unused.
Well, you can't blame them for following in the footsteps of canon, can you? :P I mean, the most emotion-filled and touching moment for H/G, the moment when Harry cared about Ginny the most, was... er... the break-up. I'd point to the scene where Hermione nearly died in the DoM and Harry went into shock until he found out she was still alive as the analogous scene for H/Hr, which, if nothing else, would have the enormous advantage of occurring before a relationship began, rather than at its end.

I mean, H/Hr has friendship and seven years of history piled on top of the physical attraction.
It's funny about that... Rowling seems really not to be into friendship-pairings, even though she sets them up well. Young Snape/Lily, literally within the same chapter that Rowling introduces it, gets shot down with extreme prejudice. Heck, even ignoring friendship pairings that conflicted with any others, she wrote Dumbledore and Grindelwald as being best friends and the only people who really fit each other (with the implications of Dumbledore's only perfect match being a sadistic Dark Lord entirely aside), and then revealed Dumbledore as gay. So, obviously that friendship was bit stronger than platonic friendship, right? Er... what a coincidence, that happens to be the pairing she keeps going at with a crowbar in interviews.

I mean, H/Hr has friendship and seven years of history piled on top of the physical attraction. H/G is just ... the physical attraction, nothing else. *yawns*
And it's weird, because as Ginny herself points out in OOTP, there IS something the two of them have in common - being personally abused by Voldemort. But after OOTP, it's as if JKR completely forgot about this. Does she have something against pairings where the couple has ANYTHING in common besides House affiliation? (And Quidditch, of course. Musn't forget Quidditch.) I'm not particularly peeved or anything*, I just find it... weird.

* This is technically a lie, but only about Grindelwald/Dumbledore, because she took her sweet time deciding she was going to declare that it was unrequited and that Grindelwald had all the character complexity of a sheet of cardboard. EVIL cardboard. In the meantime, I had been declaring that she was a genius for writing such a perfect pairing and for throwing in some moral complexity into her writing. Whoops...

---
Ack, and sorry to ramble so much! Nice to meet you, by the way - I've seen your posts back when I used to read FictionAlley Park and liked your style. Good to see you on LJ! :)

[madderbrad.livejournal.com]

... which, if nothing else, would have the enormous advantage of occurring before a relationship began, rather than at its end.

Heh, nice observation! And that H/Hr moment - which some stories have used as the Harry-wakes-up cusp, sure - was at the end of five years of firm solid friendship, too. As well as preceding two more high school years.

Rowling seems really not to be into friendship-pairings, even though she sets them up well.

That's exactly the case, it seems. Love, for Rowling, is physical attraction, full stop. At least when it comes to the formation of the pairings, with the kids. Worse still, the only 'symptom' or evidence of young lust love that she seems to believe in is jealousy. R/Hr is founded in jealousy - Ron was jealous of Krum and such from 4th year, and then we had both Ron and Hermione using classmates to try and get the other jealous. That's how we know for sure that they are 'in love'. Ugh.

And H/G was born in jealousy - the chest monster raging over Dean kissing Ginny - and then Ginny's prime characteristic in Deathly Hallows was jealousy of any female that hove within kissing distance of Harry. Even eleven year old girls (I think Gabrielle was eleven?).

I've read countless fan fiction stories - H/Hr, H/G, H/L - which have been immeasurably superior when it comes to convincing the reader of the bona-fide *affection* and 'love' that Harry has for the girl and vice versa. But with Rowling all we got was jealousy and a couple of kisses. And Harry's thoughts - he liked Ginny's kisses, found her pretty, and once acknowledged that he liked the fact that she didn't cry. And that's as far as it went for Harry in the canon. :-(

What is your name on Fiction Alley? I'm disappointed that you have penetrated my secret identity so quickly! :-)

[philstar22.livejournal.com]

Except that Archie is a whole lot more like Ron, and not just in looks, so the comparisons don't really work. Betty is only a little like Hermione, and Veronica is a rich!Ginny. I don't see any real ship comparisons that work between the two fandoms.

[madderbrad.livejournal.com]

Except that Archie is a whole lot more like Ron, and not just in looks --

I guess we're just looking at the 'romantic' aspects of the characters, and Archie chasing after Veronica because of chest-monster-like lust "because she's sexy" (to quote Harpsi-fizz) rings a bell of accord with Harry as he was in the last two books.

However, what harpsi-fizz said about Veronica going after Archie "only when he shows an interest in Betty" certainly doesn't apply to Ginny; even she isn't that bad! :-)

Given as how canon!Hermione never displayed any romantic interest in Harry at all I guess Betty is even more distant from the attempted parallel with HP. My dim recollection was that she was always there as a friend to Archie, helping him, like Hermione did for Harry, whereas Veronica was much more strictly and obviously in the "girl to lust over" slot, so it was that 'supporting friend' thing which appealed to me there. But it's been a long time since I read an Archie comic, and very few of them at that.

[philstar22.livejournal.com]

I can see the comparisons, I guess. I just dislike Archie so much (about as much as I dislike Ron) and don't think he deserves either girl.

[harpsi-fizz.livejournal.com]

But Ron/Draco makes such a yummy side pairing to H/Hr!

[philstar22.livejournal.com]

Could work. :) I'd totally read it.